Happy Birthday Mommy!!! I know you're probably spending your day with Grandma, Grandpa and Sheila. Tell them I said hi and I love and miss y'all. I don't want to take too much of your time during your birthday but I wanted to tell you I still can't believe you're gone. There's not a day that goes by that I don't think of you or pray that you watch over us. I know you're probably proud of some things and not so proud of other things. I'm back working so that's a good thing and I finally put an album out! You know my plan has always been to let the 'day job pay for the dream job, until the dream job pays for itself'. Zay is getting big..he's not bad but you can tell he and Ya-Ya go at it lol. Speaking of Ya-Ya...guess what ..she's giving you another grandson. Yup Zay is gonna have a brother and he named him Jacob. Yea Jacob lol he said he got the name from Twilight. Baby-D is going through some things right now. He's been away for a few months and even though he's not somewhere I would like to see him.. sometimes some space away from this outside world can clean you up. He probably has taking your passing the hardest mainly because you didn't get to see your granddaughter, Amber. He loves that girl. I wish you would've got to see her too. I can picture you watching her and cursing Baby-D out every time he does something wrong because he's new to the father world. I'm also pretty sure she would have loved to be with you the same way all the kids in the family loved being with you. Cynthia looks just like you to me. Hold up...Cynthia looks JUST LIKE YOU. Lol it's scary and beautiful at the same time. When I see her, I see you. She reminds me that you're not here anymore but I'll always remember the special moments we had as a family. I know a lot people judged you and misinterpreted your condition but I never did...WE never did....WE understood you and know throughout all the hard times you really just wanted to be the best mother and grandmother you could be for us. Sometimes your challenge got the best of you but it never kept you down. You fought until the end and we were excited about the possibility of seeing you whole again. I never thought that day at the court house in New York was gonna be the last day I would get to see you alive. I still have the picture in my head of you walking away. I saw the tears in your eyes. We were ready for you to come home. It still seems crazy that you passed the day before you were suppose to come home. Maybe God didn't want you to come back to the poison out here. Maybe he felt like you would be better by his side and close to Grandma, Grandpa and Sheila. Whatever the case may be I miss you... I love you... Happy Birthday
Love,
Ish
P.S..... Michelle is supposed to move back up here in June...and she got the Ziti on deck.... lol.... Hopefully Me, Michelle, Keebee, Shawn and Steve can hold it down... I think so
12-01-12
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